THE CRIMES OF ENGLAND

BY GILBERT K. CHESTERTON

MCMXVI

1916

CONTENTS

CHAPTER I

SOME WORDS TO PROFESSOR WHIRLWIND

The German Professor, his need of Education for DebateThree Mistakes of German ControversialistsThe Multiplicity of ExcusesFalsehood against Experience Kultur preached by UnkulturThe Mistake about Bernard ShawGerman Lack of Welt-PolitikWhere England is really Wrong.

CHAPTER II

THE PROTESTANT HERO

Suitable Finale for the German EmperorFrederick II. and the Power of FearGerman Influence in England since LatherOur German Kings and Allies Triumph of Frederick the Great.

CHAPTER III

THE ENIGMA OF WATERLOO

How we helped NapoleonThe Revolution and the Two GermanicsReligious Resistance of Austria and RussiaIrreligious Resistance of Prussia and EnglandNegative Irreligion of Englandits Idealism in SnobbishnessPositive Irreligion of Prussia; no Idealism in AnythingAllegory and the French RevolutionThe Dual Personality of England; the Double BattleTriumph of Blucher.

CHAPTER IV

THE COMING OF THE JANISSARIES

The Sad Story of Lord SalisburyIreland and HeligolandThe Young Men of IrelandThe Dirty WorkThe Use of German MercenariesThe Unholy AllianceTriumph of the German Mercenaries.

CHAPTER V

THE LOST ENGLAND

Truth about England and IrelandMurder and the Two TravellersReal Defence of EnglandThe Lost RevolutionStory of Cobbett and the GermansHistorical Accuracy of CobbettViolence of the English LanguageExaggerated Truths versus Exaggerated LiesDefeat of the PeopleTriumph of the German Mercenaries.

CHAPTER VI

HAMLET AND THE DANES

Degeneration of Grimm's Fairy TalesFrom Tales of Terror to Tales of TerrorismGerman Mistake of being DeepThe Germanisation of ShakespeareCarlyle and the Spoilt ChildThe Test of Teutonism Hell or Hans AndersenCauses of English InactionBarbarism and Splendid Isolation The Peace of the PlutocratsHamlet the EnglishmanThe Triumph of Bismarck.

CHAPTER VII

THE MIDNIGHT OF EUROPE

The Two NapoleonsTheir Ultimate SuccessThe Interlude of SedanThe Meaning of an EmperorThe Triumph of VersaillesThe True Innocence of England Triumph of the Kaiser.

CHAPTER VIII

THE WRONG HORSE

Lord Salisbury AgainThe Influence of 1870The Fairy Tale of TeutonismThe Adoration of the CrescentThe Reign of the CynicsLast Words to Professor Whirlwind.

CHAPTER IX

THE AWAKENING OF ENGLAND

The March of MontenegroThe Anti-Servile StateThe Prussian PreparationThe Sleep of EnglandThe Awakening of England.

CHAPTER X

THE BATTLE OF THE MARNE

The Hour of PerilThe Human DelugeThe English at the Marne.

THE CRIMES OF ENGLAND